More delicious spam
Every now and then the creativity of the email spammers and phishers brings a smile to may face. Perhaps you’ll agree with me that the following demonstrates a certain flair and, shall we say, audacity:
I will like to start with reminding you that your unclaimed inheritance is still lurking around, up till now I am amazed at the way you have ignored all the notice I have sent out to you.
Upon the receipt of this mail I will want you to reconfirm to me your details and also tell me the reason why you have kept quiet all the while; I do believe you should have a logical answer to that.
Oh dear, oh dear, I better come up with something good.
And then there’s this:
This message will be the last notice that I will be sending out to you.
Is that a promise?
Hey, it’s the audacity of hope.
I wonder if these guys ever realize that their English structure just isn’t right. I’m not saying it is grammatically incorrect – it doesn’t seem so to me, but grammar skills are fair-to-middling. But it is idiomatically stilted.
Native speakers don’t write like that.
My favorites are the ones I get occasionally with a pic of a willowy, blonde, twenty-something surfer girl that begin, “Hi! I got your name from a friend. I’m just looking for cool guy to hang out with.” To paraphrase the late, great Groucho Marx, “I don’t want anything to do with a willowy, blonde, twenty-something, and obviously desperate, surfer girl who wants to “hang out” with an aging, balding, 61 year old Baby Boomer like me.”
Ha! I just got that one yesterday, and it made me smile, too!
It’s the spammers who write saying they’ve seen me on Facebook and were just so impressed and want to know me.
…I don’t do Facebook.
…but I do recall the recent spam from the guy giving me “one last chance” …to receive someone else’s inheritance.
To paraphrase the late, great Groucho Marx
Ah, you’re tapping the wisdom of the wrong guy. You need to try a little George Burns:
You’re only as old as the women you feel.