I want to get one thing straight at the outset: the plural of “bluetooth” is “bluetooths,” not “blueteeth.”
And don’t be misled by all those nitpicky claims (this, for example) that there is no plural of “bluetooth” because it’s an adjective modifying “headset” or “speaker” or “connective device” or the like. Yes, it is. But that’s not the way people use the word – they say “bluetooth” to mean the thing itself. And so I have arbitrarily chosen “bluetooths” as my plural, because “blueteeth” sounds too much like – well, like blue teeth.
I have a great many bluetooths. That’s because I have an arm disability that means that holding a phone up to my ear for any longer than a minute or so can spark various kinds of pain. And, since I like to talk on the phone for lengthy periods – at least, with certain people – I have an assortment of the finest bluetooths in the land, about four of them.
But one is my very favorite. It has best sound, both outgoing and incoming, and a near-perfect fit in my ear. Therein lies another idiosyncrasy – my ear is quite small and over-the-ear devices don’t work, although full headsets do. So with a small bluetooth I have to use the in-ear sorts with the rubber tips, and it’s necessary to have the tips that come in several sizes because I need a small size.
Have I succeeded in boring you sufficiently yet? And I haven’t even come to the meat of the post – which is that bluetooths are very easy to lose and once lost they are hard to find. Most are black or white; maybe I should get one in shocking pink, but I haven’t seen any.
However, all bluetooths are small, and they lack those gizmos that make it possible to call them and have them beep back. So when they’re lost in some crevice or other – and many of these crevices seem to lie in wait in my purses – they sometimes stay lost for quite a while.
I had a whole stable of my favorite type, but over the years, one by one they’ve bitten the dust. One even committed suicide by having its “on/off” switch break in a way that made it non-repairable.
And you probably can guess the rest – which is that now they’ve stopped making that model, and a lot of people online say that its supposed replacement is much much worse. I can buy ones from China for a song that are supposedly new and purport to be the type I’m looking for, but I don’t believe they’re new at all, and in the US people are selling used ones (ugh – a used earpiece!) for many hundreds of dollars.
I don’t even necessarily want to find one of the old ones, and that’s why I haven’t named what brand and model it is. I recently lost my last one and found it again, so the need isn’t all that pressing at the moment. But for the future I’d actually like to break my dependence on this type and would prefer to branch out to something new and readily available – readily available, that is, until they stop making that one, too.
[NOTE: It occurs to me that maybe I should start a new blog category called something like, “me and my war with gadgets, or gadgets’ war with me.”]


