Fashionable memory
From commenter “Ruth,” on the Saturday Night Fever Open Thread today:
Ten seconds of that video and I’m back to 1977, sitting in a packed theater beside my sweetheart. I have on my brand new Christmas boots – black, high heels. My black and cream plaid midi-skirt and cream cowl neck sweater. It’s cold outside but pretty sure my coat’s in the car. I wanted to look thin and cute for my date. Nineteen-year-old girls would rather be cold than wear a coat. We’ve been married now for 42 years…..
Is this kind of recall a woman-thing? Genetic??
I share that kind of recall. For whatever reason, I remember what I wore on many many occasions, both good and bad. I keenly recall what I wore when I first met my husband-to-be. It was a nifty white-and-navy print A-line dress with a front zipper, and it was from Marimekko. Late 60s. I even remember how I wore my hair that day.
One of the things that strikes me, reading Ruth’s reminiscence and thinking of my own, is how spiffy and dressed-up we ordinarily were, even in the 60s. Sometimes we wore hippie garb, but often we donned trendy and sharp-looking clothes, especially segueing into the 70s. Photos confirm it, too.
Yes, I think it’s a woman thing. Men’s fashions tend to vary much less, but that’s not the only reason. I also think it may be a genetic thing – my grandmother had the same snapshot-type memory for what she and everyone else in the room wore.
Neo – what fun! Thanks! For the record, my husband has zero memory of the movie, the date, the outfit. None! Exactly what DO men think about?
I bet you’re familiar with Ilene Beckerman’s book “Love, Loss, and What I Wore.” Nora Ephron turned it into a play.
I felt immediate kinship with her ability to recall all of her life’s important moments via her clothing choices. It’s a really charming book…short and with her own little sketches…but not just about clothes…surprisingly poignant and memorable.
There is surely no question about women being more likely than men to remember what they were wearing at specific times, often very far in the past. “Love, Loss, and What I Wore”–one thing I do remember from when that book appeared is surprise that anyone could remember such things.
I will go a step further: women in general are more likely to remember details from the past than men, and maybe even have better memories overall. My wife, for instance, once surprised her mother by saying that she could remember when her younger brother was born. My wife was only two at the time and her mother doubted her. My wife proved it by describing in some detail her grandmother’s house, where she stayed while the baby was being born, and which was extensively remodeled not long afterwards. She could remember things like the position of a door which was taken out during the remodeling and replaced by a wall. We now live in the town where she grew up and when we’re out she frequently gives me very detailed accounts of various features of the town as it was when she was growing up in the ’50s and ’60s–what was where, what replaced it, what’s there now, often with an account of the intermediate transitions.
I have virtually no memory of what clothes I wore at any normal time. Some special occasions a little, but not clear details, the blue, black, or burgundy bow tie with the tuxedo. Most smart women have far better memories for day to day living details. More men have better sport score & sport special plays.
Women like fashion, & care, while men like sports, & care, tho now many mostly prefer couch potato e-sports. With huge numbers watching other gamers make videos of themselves playing some e-sport.
Talking about what you remember often helps the memory be remembered.
I have virtually no memory of what clothes I wore at any normal time.
Same here. I’ll go further, if I were in a room and you asked me what other people in the room were wearing, I wouldn’t have a clue. I regard it as a triumph if I notice that someone got a haircut.
One of the things I appreciate about the Althouse blog is that she notices what politicians wear and asks what the choice might mean. It is a window into an alien world.
I remember what my wife was wearing the first time I saw her for about three seconds in the lobby of the IUS SIL in the spring of 1980. I remember what she was wearing when I finally got her in my arms two and half years later at the Halloween party.
Hah. Not only do I remember what I was wearing, and my husband, but as the keeper of the household closets, I saved my top and pants, and the blue shirt he was wearing, and they were archived in a box. They no longer fit either of us properly (20+ years will do that), but my daughter snagged the pants for her own wardrobe. She tried them on (to be fair, they were designer, and hence catnip to a teenager), donned a pair of heels, twirled before the mirror, and announced that she looked GREAT in them. Yep. Welcome to my pre-baby body, sweetheart. Their work may not yet be done, lol.
Yes, clothing and who wore what seems to be primarily a female talent.
However, I can recall what I wore based on the period of my life. 1955 -1968 my daytime outfit would be a Navy uniform. 1968 – 1993 my working outfit would be an airline uniform. And all myco-worker wore the same.
See, men can remember what they wore. Well, sort of. 🙂
Vive la différence!!
—
Alan J. Lerner wrote timeless lyrics about all this:
“Why Can’t A Woman Be More Like A Man”
Rex Harrison (My Fair Lady)
“(Ah Yes) I Remember It Well”
Maurice Chevalier & Hermìone Gingold (Gigi)
And Mr. Lerner was married and divorced 7 or 8 times — so, there ya go.
No memory for clothing – but I do remember what food was served at special occasions.
I do remember what food was served
“… he elucidated a beautiful history of both the conference and the package (as well as, crucially, the dinner menu each year”
A bit of exaggeration, but I did mention several 🙂
So, which “social construct’ is it that enables women to better remember what they wore long ago, whereas almost all men (me included) have no idea what we wore last week?
Which leads me to wonder about those people who claim that gender has absolutely nothing to do with biology. Do these folks really believe this? Or are they trying to appear “intellectual,” and above the fray?
The difference between the sexes in regard to clothes is mentioned in Northanger Abbey.