Home » Reassuring evidence that we’re in the best of hands

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Reassuring evidence that we’re in the best of hands — 38 Comments

  1. That’s why the Air Force uses two people to authorize some actions.

    This gives some insight into living under a missile threat from North Korea.

  2. This is a test of the emergency broadcast system. If this were a real emergency, deplorables would be instructed to evacuate paradise in order to make room for the liberal elite to enjoy their beachfront estates.

  3. Pressed the wrong button? Good thing it was one for an alert rather than LAUNCH!

  4. Someone didn’t follow the cardinal rule of Air Force pilots from days gone by: “Never fuck with the red-guarded switches”.

  5. Dude, I hate to say I told you so, but I told you so.

    This is what comes of having an administration that is woefully underrepresented in a key, high-performing, (and universally beloved), demographic.

    I speak of course of the “Bro” demographic generally and of the “Bros who also happen to be Guidos” demographic in particular.

    Had the Mooch not been so unfairly banished from an official posting in the West Wing, Hawaii would never have dared to be so uncool as to send this snafu message.

    Although Hawaii has urgently requested the services of the Mooch, Anthony now having completed his important work in Missouri where he served on secondment as the Governor’s social etiquette adviser and personal fitness trainer, (specialising in the blind-folded, manacled pull-up), he is nevertheless unavailable to the state of Hawaii at this time.

    The Mooch is currently rendering valuable service to the nation in his current informal gig as adviser to the president on vocabulary, colorful turns of phrase and bro colloquialisms. He simply cannot be spared.

    Fortunately, the Mooch’s little bro, the totally gnarly and righteous young bro, Vinnie Scaramucci, has today been dispatched from Vegas to take control of Hawaii’s emergency notification service.

    Here is footage of Vinnie Scaramucci taken at his recent graduation from the Vegas campus of the US Bro Academy. You will readily recognise why Vinnie is a superb fit for this mission.

    There will surely be no slips of the trigger finger for Vinnie since he has intensively trained not only his trigger finger or even his wrist – but his entire right arm.

    Vinnie may not be as swole as we bro’s would like but what he lacks in muscle he more than makes up for in swagger and hair gel.

    We wish you all the fist-pumpin’ best in your new assignment, brah.

    -issued for and on behalf of:
    “The International Society of Bros, especially Bros who are also Guidos, Inc”

    Hashtag# Bringbackthemooch.

  6. Neo,

    I live in Honolulu and this was quite a shock today. I put my wife on a plane for Japan yesterday (she’s Japanese) for a quick visit with her folks and this thing went off at about 8:15 our time today (about when I got the first alert on my phone). There was a period of about 10 minutes where that was the only alert I had…I was getting ready for a language class at UH Manoa and was just about to leave. As soon as I got the alert I turned on Fox…nothing. I turned on CNN…nothing. I turned on all the local channels…nothing. I had no idea what to expect, but after ten minutes an alert came across on KITV, and that’s when I called my wife in Japan, told her what was happening, told her I was seeking shelter, and told her I loved her. So, for the next ten minutes, I made my peace with the world, and felt that this was the way i was going out as I went downstairs to our parking garage to take cover. After about 10-15 min we got the word it was a false alarm, mainly because I work at Hickam AFB and have friends who could tell me before others. But other folks went longer without knowing, which is inexcusable. Whoever in the HI state government is responsible for this should lose their job, but they won’t. This state has been run by Democrats for time immemorial, and that won’t end, an crap like this will continue. As Griffin said, it will be laid at Trump’s feet and no responsibility will be taken by local officials, just as no responsibility will be taken for any of their other myriad f**kups. What a disgusting mess; it was a thrilling day, but not the kind of thrill I wanted.

  7. I’m just glad there was no loss of life in an ensuing panic.
    That guy putting his kids in a manhole would be appropriate in the event of an attack, but downright dangerous when no threat is imminent.

  8. I have to be the bad guy, but here it is. Hawaii is just a beach. And it’s a long an expensive way to go so as I can be disrespected by Samoans.

    Aloha, mofos.

  9. “an employee had pressed the wrong button”

    Maybe if they had bigger buttons like Trump has they would not be so confused.

  10. There is still no explanation so all I can say is “Democrats.” I was in Honolulu for the Transpac finish in 2005 after many years not visiting Hawaii Yacht Club and was astonished at the poor conditions. The marina at Ala Wai was a mess. Complete change from 1981 when I was in the race. This should be a source of revenue for the state government but it looks like a slum.

    It’s an example of the Murray Gell-Mann amnesia effect. I know about boats and marinas so can judge the competence of the state government from that. I’m sure everything else is a mess, too. Like the EMA.

  11. I’m hearing it was a glitch. We all know that glitches have been running rampant over the past couple of decades since Al Gore invented the internet. And these glitches seem to be multiplying. I think we need a blue-ribbon bipartisan commission to study and determine the best policy proposal for the immediate reduction and ultimate eradication of glitches.

  12. Any possibility that this bogus warning was the result of a North Korean hack? A detailed and plausible explanation of this bogus warning would be reassuring.

  13. If someone pushed the wrong button, then it is not a glitch or gremlins. I have one word,… feedback. Can’t someone somewhere pick up a phone and call someone who absolutely knows the correct state of threat?

    My part of coastal CA has tsunami alert signs and a warning system, that was put up in the last several years. But if you look at the real threat, which are the sub-oceanic fault regions like the Gorda and Mendocino plates, all that action is far north of the central coast. More junk science or needless alarmism?

  14. What if someone pushed the “wrong” button intentionally? What if some member of the “resistance” wanted to goad the President into an overreaction & in their own mind thought “This is the one…this will get him impeached or overthrown”?

    I know…never attribute to malice what can be explained by incompetence…but Jake, this is Hawaii…the land of no Republican office-holders.

  15. Stephen Ippolito Says: vlah vlah blah guido bro… and other blather.

    Hey, yo, Ippolito… what are you talking about. Your entire response seemed to be an attempt at “satire” but without the point or humor.

    Can you rewrite that with an eye towards…ah…. lucidity?

  16. I’m with TommyJay on this. I think it was an intentional slip-up. To make Trump look bad, knowing that the media will assist in helping to place blame on him for any ensuing chaos.

  17. van:

    Stephen appears to have had an “off” comment which for him was unusual. Glass houses dude.

  18. HotAir is running a story which attributes the error to a slip-up while having a shift change in the middle of a drill alert.
    Umm. Yeah.
    Obviously you are going to schedule a major drill activity so it runs over the shift time.
    And some flustered employee (agent? who runs these things?) clocks out before he finishes the exercise and the new guy hits the wrong button, or the old guy does ’cause he’s in a hurry to get off the clock.
    How much confidence does this give Hawai’ians that their agency is going to get it right if Kim does let fly?

  19. Van der Loon queefed: some pointless, mean-spirited flatus.

    Since you have paid me the compliment of sharing with us all what you stupidly believe to be your own wisdom, I know you won’t mind if I now return the favour – it’s just that mine has a lot more truth behind it.

    I know you won’t be offended at all- since my opinion of you is offered up with every bit of the respect that you deserve.

    Ready, precious?

    What a brave little internet tough guy you are; you wretched, insignificant, cowardly little twat.

    If I could get my hands on you for just 5 minutes you’d be crapping your dentures out through your Haiti one by one for a week.

    Safe behind the internet you so “bravely” queefed out what you imagine to be your infallible opinion and advice. You no doubt now are looking about you like the overgrown child you are and expecting plaudits for your bravery.

    You’re getting none from me. I see right through you – it’s not hard to do. Your inflated and unjustified self-regard is obvious. Stupidity and arrogance – that’s a sad coupling. But deep down you know that, don’t you, precious? Try being honest with yourself for a change – and you might just recognise what a bitter old queen you are.

    What a sad, pathetic, pretentious little poof you are.
    And don’t bother retorting that you can’t be gay because you have a “wife” or some (very unfortunate) “kids”. Any old flamer can his “beard” serviced by a stud or taken to with a turkey baster.

    Who the hell are you to appoint yourself supreme arbiter of what’s good or bad? Yes, I’m aware that many gay men do have good taste and are therefore qualified to judge – but you’re certainly not one of them you sad, self-loathing old queen.

    I hadn’t heard of you before your recent queef which says something about the quality of your own “contributions” here so I went back and looked up your own comments. Talk about a joke. What insufferable, pretentious rubbish. Just a hypocrite with delusions of grandeur. Try developing some insight into your self and you won’t be so arrogant preaching to others.

    Who the hell are you to pontificate on standards, anyway? You’d do well to look to your own failings before lecturing your betters, (which from what I see, is everyone else not you).

    I’d tell you to go screw yourself but it’s obvious that your head is so far up your own arse that there’s hardly room enough for your boyfriend’s little dick.

    It occurs to me that this has probably been a waste of good advice as you obviously went the full retard long ago. Still, I feel a lot better for voicing my opinion.

    And, afterall, in your ugly little world that’s all that matters, isn’t it?

  20. PPS. Oh yes, I almost forgot:

    (sound of microphone dropping to ground).

    Ippolito, Out!

  21. I knew it was some idiotic snafu when the civil defense sirens didn’t go off. Stayed in bed. Yawn.
    And no, it wasn’t a deliberate attempt to make Trump look bad. No one in government here has that much initiative. In fact, no one in government here has any initiative at all. And considering who’s running the place, that’s a good thing.

  22. All over FB, it’s being blamed on Trump. The latest I saw was that he knew about it and was golfing, and didn’t tweet that it was in error.

    TDS is a mental illness.

  23. AUTHOR: Scalia Spoke Favorably of Trump Presidential Run…

    ‘Refreshing to have candidate unfiltered and utterly frank’…

  24. when being disrespectful to mamma has reached a peak as a reason for impeachment of a president of one of the most powerful countries in the history of the universe (As far as man knows now)…

    you start to see WHY ladies were not much welcome in politics
    this in a world of the past where men shot each other for insults not impeached each other…

    Impeach Trump for ‘name-calling,’ ‘disrespect of women’ – Maxine Waters

  25. Hawaii:

    Gov – Dem
    Lt. Gov – Dem
    Atty. Gen – Dem
    Sec of State – Dem

    US Senators – Dem (2)
    US Representatives – Dem(2)

    All State Senators – Dem (25)
    State Representatives – (Dem/Rep) (45/6).

    Did that without an Ad Hominum attack too.

    I read that it was Trump’s Fault…Interesting.

    I wouldn’t be at all surprised if it was somebody’s brother-in-law with who ‘needed’ a job that touched it off? Or that maybe the guy wasn’t screened for being an extremely stable employee who had no record of drugs, booze, etc?

    I had a second cousin who was an Air Force launch officer. They are very well screened. The most exciting thing I ever heard of the guy doing was to have won the knitting contest at the Iowa State Fair. Apparently, he had a lot of time on his hands? The crowd and judges were quite surprised when he showed up in uniform to collect the prize.

    I still trust the Air Force today…Dems in Hawaii…not so much.

  26. So, the State government in Hawaii actually has a button that says: “Push in the event of a possible nuclear attack” ?

    Color me skeptical.

  27. Agree with Richf. If you look around at various machines, even copiers, buttons are not sticking up like sore thumbs. Some are recessed. Some, as on the laptop I’m using now, are flush with the body of the machine.
    It’s difficult to visualize setting off a button by putting a coffee cup on it, even if it were on a horizontal surface. Or by leaning on it while reaching for something.
    This dude went looking for a button to push and, if we are to believe the story, picked the wrong one to push. Then he pushed it. Not knowing it was the wrong one.
    After which, we must believe, there was no indication that something drastic had been done. “r u sure?” No beeping.
    Or is “button” a metaphor for some other method of getting something started, such as clicking on a window or something? If this is the case, then he’d have been looking at a screen which said “NUCLEAR MISSILE ALERT” Maybe next to the one asking if he wanted a potty break.
    I”m interested in the last line. “This Is Not A Drill”.
    It’s the last line of the famous message sent one Sunday morning three quarters of a century ago. From which I draw the tentative conclusion that this might have been purposeful with some literary punch.
    I figure such messages, composed in advance, might have such reassurances, but the phrasing leaves me wondering.

  28. Not a button, but a drop-down menu on a computer program:

    Around 8:05 a.m., the Hawaii emergency employee initiated the internal test, according to a timeline released by the state. From a drop-down menu on a computer program, he saw two options: “Test missile alert” and “Missile alert.” He was supposed to choose the former; as much of the world now knows, he chose the latter, an initiation of a real-life missile alert.

    More:

    Part of what worsened the situation Saturday was that there was no system in place at the state emergency agency for correcting the error, [Hawaii Emergency Management Agency] spokesmansaid. The state agency had standing permission through FEMA to use civil warning systems to send out the missile alert – but not to send out a subsequent false alarm alert, he said.

    Insanity/incompetence all the way down.

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