Commenter “Brian E” notes:
I hope our perceptions of age become skewed, otherwise I’m going crazy. I’ve found myself seeing people that look exactly like the ones I knew from 30-40 years ago. Only it’s not them. I’ve had to remind myself it can’t be them, because they would look as old as I do if it was them.
Yes, yes, and yes! I experience this on a regular basis, complete with the awareness that it can’t be them. My hunch is that although we are all unique – yes, even identical twins – there nevertheless is a finite number of general “looks” for faces and that’s what we’re seeing – a variation on one of those themes.
In addition, some people change a great deal over time and become nearly unrecognizable. Sometimes it’s about weight gain and/or illness, but often it’s just sag and wrinkle and droopy eyelids. And yet there are others who defy time and look not just younger than the rest of the people their age, but very much like their younger selves with just a few droops here and there. It’s uncanny. I noticed it at my 50th (yes, 50th) high school reunion in particular – the variance in the rate of aging was phenomenal given that we were all roughly the same age.
And the board with the photos of the deceased was getting uncomfortably full.
Then there’s this observation by commenter “AesopFan”:
All of the pictures on our walls are of our family from at least 20 years ago or more, and sometimes when the boys are here, especially the ones I see infrequently, I have to consciously tell myself that all those pudgy, balding, and sometimes bearded old men were my little boys.
That reminds me of my mother’s reaction when my brother started to lose some hair (he’s not bald yet; just receding at a slow pace) and I went gray; she was somewhat dismayed. “Oh, no!” she said. I was a bit miffed, but I realized she was thinking of her own advancing age more than ours. Our appearance was just a reminder of the passage of time.
And then there was my own experience when I had cataract surgery:
A day or two after my cataract surgery I was looking at a relative and noticed he looked older. There were lines in his face I’d never seen before. It was alarming, because at first I thought there had been a sudden and abrupt aging process. But then I realized that it was just that I was seeing more clearly the details I hadn’t seen before, like when HDTV first came out.
Then the same thing happened with my own face in the mirror.
Initially I had figured it was because the surgery had been stressful. Then I thought it was because I wasn’t wearing eye makeup. Then I decided it was the extra-bright lighting in the bathroom that I was using as a guest.
Then I closed my left eye – the one with the new lens in it – and looked at myself in the mirror with my right eye. The lines disappeared, and I looked the way I had thought I looked all these years. Soft focus, lines blurred or erased.
Oh, well. It’s a small price to pay to be able to see better. But a disconcerting one.
I’m used to the sight of my own face in the mirror now. But if I ever want to go back in time, all I have to do is close my left eye, and the lines soften instantly when looking through the cataract in my right eye. A time machine!