One person’s junk is another person’s family jewels
John Tyner has become a YouTube folk hero for declining a TSA patdown in no uncertain terms when he told the screener, “If you touch my junk, I’m going to have you arrested.”
The usually astute Charles Krauthammer demonstrates that he didn’t exactly have his finger on the nation’s—uh, pulse—when he said [emphasis mine]:
It doesn’t have the elegance of “Don’t tread on me,” but that was the age of the musket. This is the age of Twitter. It’s got a directness that I really like.
And over the ages people have come up with hundreds of words to describe the private parts. This guy just invented a new one. It’s quite remarkable.
Charles, even I know that the term’s been in use for quite some time before Tyner made it more famous.
And in fact, it would be difficult to think of a term that hasn’t been used by somebody somewhere sometime for that portion of the male anatomy. Human ingenuity knows no bounds.
Yes, and I invented the light bulb, Charles. For those with too much junk, you could always call 1-800-GOT-JUNK?
That ingenuity link is hilarious, by the way.
Yoga pose last night
Thought: “Need to readjust my junk”
Then started giggling
Now we have the opportunity for some new names.
Don’t touch my…
Captain Skully
bureaucrat magnet
stewardess missle
jet set
flightplan
ladies oxygen mask
tray in upright position
middle seat
underhead compartment
The new phrase I’ve most enjoyed: TSA, You don’t get on until we get off.
…. I’m now fairly sure that some guy has used the term “ingenuity” for that area.
Bags fly free!
Here’s one Wikisaurus missed — tarse — from John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester (not the originator, just a populizer).
I saw the term “junk” used in this regard on the TV show NCIS Los Angeles when the female investigator kicked a guy in the groin. I had never heard it before, but if it is used on a TV show it must be in current usage by the young and hip.
I read an article some years ago by a woman who was giving speeches at various colleges and was referencing family values TV shows from the fifties and sixties. She was sure she was reaching her audience because of the mummer that arose every time she mentioned the “Beaver”.
The fact that he didn’t know “junk” was already out there and used regularly IN THAT WAY, makes me love him more.
His brain has bigger fish to fry.
Idjit… if you want something new (or at least less commonly heard) go with the Atlantic writer talking to the TSA agent.
When told they’d run a hand up his thigh until they “meet resistance”… he commented his surprise as that was what he called his testicles. “The Resistance”.