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Martha Stewart, swimsuit model

The New Neo Posted on by

Sports Illustrated has decided to feature the 81-year-old Martha Stewart in its swimsuit edition.

Stewart was employed as a model in her youth, and she’s still an attractive woman. But I just don’t get it. Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit edition used to feature the usual sexy, young, extremely female beautiful models, but in the last few years (and I don’t know exactly when it began) they’re used many people who don’t fit that description, such as heavy people and transgender people. This is a trend in store advertising, too; I’ve noticed it over and over. Many times, it seems that the number of traditional beautiful models in an ad campaign is zero.

So here’s Martha, somewhat airbrushed I’d assume, but certainly not your typical 81-year-old:

The photo is rather artfully designed to conceal the parts more vulnerable to age and showcase the others. But there’s something about it that just seems sad to me. And if I were her stylist, I’d choose a suit with more – ahem – uplift.

I guess I prefer models in general to approach an unrealizable ideal. Isn’t that part of the point? Why should looking at someone young and beautiful make the rest of us feel bad? We know what we look like, and we know that most people never look like models, even when young. But wokeness dictates that more and more models look like regular folks – although Stewart doesn’t really fit that mold, either.

Here’s a look at the bygone days of fashion.

And here are a lot of photos of Martha Stewart in her own modeling days, mostly in the 1960s. She was gorgeous. But I have some trouble perceiving it as the same person, although it is. It’s not just youth versus age; it’s that her actual features in many of the photos look very different, too.

Comments

Martha Stewart, swimsuit model — 60 Comments

  1. Franklin on women’s aging:

    The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.

    Men age a bit faster below the Girdle. The capitalization is interesting, almost German.

  3. I saw them and didn’t need to. As a young guy probably bought a few SI and had a subscription for some years. No young guy needs to get a SI to see this

  4. Yep and yep! Just told my husband (for whom I used to purchase the swimsuit edition every year), I LIKE seeing sexy women in ads! I may be over-the-hill as model material (at 66), but I still aspire to be as healthy and fit as I can be.

    I knew back in the 70s that the models in Cosmopolitan, Glamour, etc., were airbrushed.

    I *kind of* understand LL Bean, etc., having a [very] few +sized models so people of all sizes can imagine how something might look on them, but not magazines designed to appeal to–dare I say it–normal people.

    Neo: “Why should looking at someone young and beautiful make the rest of us feel bad?” I think because of the [gag] trauma it might cause them. I’m really sick of all the ways society is supposed to coddle everyone. Grow up, people. Never made me feel bad, and I grew up with a pretty negative view of myself!

  5. You’re right, Neo, I don’t look at those old photos and say, “That’s Martha Stewart.” And to whom is SI marketing these days?

  6. Rumor has it that next year’s SI swimsuit cover model will be Sam Brinton, posing next to the suitcase he stole to obtain the swimsuit.

  8. A large part of the Left’s Gramscian attack on traditional society is directed at the destruction of standards, and of people’s ability to use a justified ability to discriminate to measure and rank things in comparison to those standards; to separate what qualifies as exemplifying “The Good, the True, and the Beautiful,” from what is meretricious.

    What we might term the “uglification” of the visual arts, of architecture, and the undermining of what used to be the standard of health and beauty is part of that attack.

    For the Left this attack has the added benefit of increasing people’s general dissatisfaction and despair as they move through a world that is—more and more—filled with things that are ugly, and are lacking in any grace.

  9. There is definitely a common thread among many upper class women when they achieve positions of authority in institutions to attempt to punish a two dimensional view they have of males, especially white males. I don’t know if it’s as simple as “daddy issues,” or something else, but the pattern is very consistent.

    It’s sad, but it is also funny in that their perceptions of men are completely off the mark. The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue had its day in the sun and there was a ten year, or so run where they did amazing photo shoots with beautiful and talented female models who were at the top of their profession.

    Why the current purveyors of the modern “swimsuit issue” believe bastardizing that tradition somehow wins them something or harms the people who enjoyed the edition’s incarnation at its zenith is incomprehensible.

    One can decide renaissance art is patriarchal, or some such nonsense, and create ugly art. And one can even get some small segment of the public to invest in that ugly art. But it can never uncreate Michaelangelo’s David or Raphael’s “The Marriage of the Virgin.” Nor can the creation of lesser art eliminate the joy humans experience when viewing Michaelangelo or Raphael’s work.

    And, as we’ve discussed regarding Bud Light and Miller Lite; this isn’t a female leadership problem. There are plenty of women SI could find to oversee its swimsuit edition who would willingly create editions as good as in SI’s heyday. No, rather SI has sought women and men to steward their product that despise the product itself. Odd.

    What’s especially confusing about this practice is people can simply opt out. And they are. Put the picture of a barely adult boy play acting as Audrey Hepburn on my beer can, I’ll buy a different beer. Do the same to all the beers, I’ll learn to brew my own. None of this harms me, or anyone else. It actually makes their perceived targets stronger and only succeeds in self-harm. Odd.

  10. Snow on Pine,

    But you can’t stop good people from being graceful. Or beautiful. I’ll use my wife as an example. You could take away our home and force us to live in a cave and within two weeks that would be the prettiest, best smelling cave you’ve ever seen.

    When they gut an institution and make it an abomination those who pursue truth and beauty will not remain in an ugly institution. They will leave and form new institutions with like minded individuals.

    It’s a very childish and immature way to live one’s life.

  11. I’m not one for conspiracy theories, but I do pay attention to the conspiracy theories of others, and although I don’t keep a precise tally, I do note that over the past 5 years or so, the ones that have come to pass seem to be enjoying a comfortable majority. What are recent events telling us?

    1. Policy leaders declare to us that fossil fuels are going to be replaced by windmills, solar panels, and unicorn farts, as they busily close nuclear plants and put regulations in place that make it impossible for internal combustion engines to function economically. The logical math points to no trucks, no trains, no planes – all while policy makers travel on private jets to avoid public contact.

    2. Then lingerie manufacturers put 300lb obese, ugly women in their catalog – as if this will sell their product, as if their clientele is dominated by morbidly obese women. The same kind of themes echo through other retailers, or in Sport Illustrated, as you note.

    3. Then the manufacturer of a blue-collar, middle America brand decides to feature an attention-hound, skinny, plain, transvestite as its new spokesman, claiming that this is reaching out to a new sector. And of course we can all see the results. Ford truck puts out an impressive sports truck ad – with rainbow colors in your face. Eat it, heterosexuals!

    4. In the background we emerge from a long pandemic that was a study in poor, draconian, tyrannical policy-making, of the type that is not buttressed with actual science, but supported by a psuedo-science lacking clean data.

    I think we are being told that we no longer live in a market economy where the consumer’s preference drives product development. Our choices are now being managed, and the direction is downward, a trajectory that is intended to apply to our expectations. Quick Survey: Are your experiences as a consumer better today, or 5 years ago? Is your local business fully staffed, or has your service experience eroded? For example, are you enjoying ringing up your purchases and sacking your own groceries, next to all the vacant unstaffed registers?

    I would normally reject stray thoughts like this as conspiracy theorizing, but the theme keep re-asserting itself, over and over. We know you prefer other things, but this is all your gonna get, from now on, forever – if we feel like it .

    Am I wrong?

  13. Labeling something as a “conspiracy theory “ is what one of my old professors called a “thought stopper” I.e. this label was designed to halt all further thought and discussion on the original topic, while simultaneously denigrating the person who brought up the topic, and to switch the topic to the lack of perspicacity, the character and the sanity of the person who wants to talk about this subject.

    I point out that— over the last, say, decade or more—many things which were disdainfully dismissed as being “conspiracy theories “ have, in fact, turned out to have been true.

    In fact, I would argue that many of these theories were, if anything, too modest in their estimations of the number, depth, and reach of these conspiracies, which we now know were real.

  14. Aggie,

    In Terry Gilliam’s magnificent film, “The Adventures of Baron Munchhausen” there is a scene where a military bureaucrat is going through a queue of people passing judgement and making decisions. A wounded soldier is brought before him and he is informed of the many brave, selfless things the soldier has done in defense of the nation. The soldier humbly answers, “I only did my best, Sir.” To which the bureaucrat condemns him to death. Can’t have people rising above their circumstances and achieving greatness. It’s demoralizing to the others.

    https://youtu.be/qAd7EMfQrck

  15. ‘We know you prefer other things, but this is all your gonna get, from now on, forever- if we feel like it’

    Yep, and the scary thing is it’s going to get worse because the people in charge now still have a little sense that this is not the right way. Just wait for a decade or so when the wokesters are totally in charge.

  16. Honestly the longer this goes on, the more sense a literally diabolical explanation makes to me.

  17. Is this all just a fight about secular philosophies, governing styles, and goals or, should it all be witnessed and understood in theological terms—a straight up fight between Good and Evil?

  18. I find myself wondering the same more often, Snow on Pine. I used to think it was simply the baseness of human behavior left unchecked, but the persistence and pure evil of some of it gives me pause.

  19. I’m reading a book about “The Fourth Turning” in which every 40 years or so, the generation that built what we have then dies off leaving children who do not remember how to keep it going.

    “Hard times make strong men. Strong men make good times. Good times make weak men. Weak men make hard times.” and so it goes.

    I’m sure the feminists would object.

    On Martha Stewart looks, maybe multiple face lifts have altered her features.

  20. The Bible describes Satan as a liar. What better example of believing a lie is there when a person starts to beleive that gender can be changed? And then when it happens on a large scale and people in positions of influence are pushing it on children?

  21. One day not too long ago I was outside working in the field, by myself, away from anyone else. I was just getting hounded by guilt and regret about various things in the past- some years and even decades ago- and feeling overwhelmed and as if I was totally hopeless. This was just overwhelming. Now mind you, I try to confess my sins to the Lord and ask for forgiveness. There is such a thing as legitimate guilt, which needs repentance and confession. But this involved something more than that, although I do think that sometimes that the Lord might be dealing with a person about some sin they need to deal with and the devil jumps on the bandwagon and tries to overwhelm you into depression or hopelessness, rather than repentance .
    Any way, on this particular day that I was just getting overwhelmed, suddenly I got really mad and suspected that there was something demonic going on due to the extreme intensity and I called on the Lord, I think out loud, to deal with this demon . I probably , in my anger, said something not totally appropriate given what is written in the book of Jude about authority, but I begged the Lord to cast this demon into the abyss! Suddenly, there was a great weight lifted off of me and I felt so much peace!
    Yes, I believe there is demonic spiritual forces at work!

  22. Snow on Pine : Ephesians 6:12 ( KJV) ” For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”

  23. Re that picture: What a wonderful example of how far the SnapChat filters can go.

    ‘Cause that ain’t what Martha looks like. And those are replete with all the lifts she can afford.

  24. Chuck said, “Men age a bit faster below the Girdle.”

    Aren’t we lucky that Brandon doesn’t (yet) model swimsuits for SI? Can you imagine him (or Fetterman, for that matter) in a Speedo?

  25. }}} Why should looking at someone young and beautiful make the rest of us feel bad? We know what we look like, and we know that most people never look like models, even when young.

    Feminism, is, at its heart, not in the least about equality… not even in the general way.

    It’s about giving ugly women more power than attractive women.

    Regarding your comment — One of my favorite memes is:

    “You will never look like the girl in the magazine.
    Even the girl in the magazine does not look like the girl in the magazine”

    Realizing this, for women, is a really huge part of it. It’s why those Mall stores that specialize in glamour photos for women work — because you might, with that, start to realize how much of “the picture” is the photographer, not the woman. Yes, they start with an eye for the things they can improve the most, but it’s their “magic” that does a lot of it, and that magic can be applied to almost any woman.

    And anyone who has seen pictures of, or met, Playboy Playmates out of “special circumstances” knows this is true. Yes, they are very lovely women, and still quite attractive, still “gorgeous”, even. But the photographs in the magazine are selected out of hundreds, taken of a woman in carefully selected lighting from very specific angles and with very professionally done makeup and clothing, designed to exploit their best features and obscure their worst features (an example: Suppose she has legs that are notably a bit short for her height… photos will not be full height photos, or will have her wearing heels, or other things to reduce the appearance of that).

    The pix capture a very special moment of that woman, and it is always selected for being as close to perfection as possible. The rest of the time, she’s lucky to get to 80% of that.

    My other favorite meme on this topic is:

    “No matter how charming she is — No matter how witty and brilliant — No matter how heart stopping, breath-takingly gorgeous she is…
    Some guy, somewhere, is sick of her shit.“

  26. Jon baker– Ephesians 6:12 ( KJV) ” For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.” does seem to fit exactly what we are dealing with.

  27. A friend of ours was incensed on Facebook recently about some encomium given to Barbara Eden and Carol Burnett complimenting them on their looks. What’s the point of that, she says, they’ve had professional help. Likely that plus whatever hocus pocus the purveyors of digital photography do.
    ==
    Personally, I don’t approve of cosmetic procedures above and beyond the removal of moles and other blemishes, the repair of injuries, and orthodontics. I’d cut some slack to Martha Stewart because appearances are her business. Still, deploying an 81 year old woman doctored and doctored in this venue is kind of a sick joke. My grandmother would have disposed of this with a dry remark one line long.

  29. My other favorite meme on this topic is:

    “No matter how charming she is — No matter how witty and brilliant — No matter how heart stopping, breath-takingly gorgeous she is…
    Some guy, somewhere, is sick of her shit.“

    You’ve cleaned up the last phrase but many of us remember the original and smile.

  30. My issue with the whole business is that the art directors almost never let the girls smile. i don’t see the appeal of the ice queen.

  31. One of my favorite covers was with Kathy Ireland whose eyes alone were mesmerizing. In addition to being a wife and mother she has become a successful businesswoman. No airhead her.

  32. I think one should stress the positive…whenever possible.

    She’s a real inspiration to ex-cons everywhere!!

  33. james comey thought she was the most dangerous woman in the world, sarc,

  34. For years I knew who Martha was and her silly show was kind of entertaining and great for jokes and stand up humor. Then she got sideways with the government doing what politicians have done for years and they made an example of her and hung her out to dry, including prison time and that seemed a bit too much for me. When she did her time and made it on out she became my favorite ex-con and now doing this silly magazine stunt I think she has accomplished a home run, once more she is a viable celebrity and yes, she used her body as a woman to make a splash. Next thing she might do is announce she is running for president of the USA, we do like our golden hair celebrities.

    Maybe because I am an old man, three years younger than Martha married to a woman my age who is still a splendid looking woman I appreciate an older cleavage and softer curves and I enjoy seeing this older woman laughing and appearing to have a good time doing silly stuff. Remember in our current times she is just about the right age to run for national office which is totally silly and I am not sure if being an excon would keep her from doing that.

  35. Three notes:

    1. Martha Stewart’s tv show did a wedding reception in my sister’s horse barn right after it was built (before any horses in it). I’ve always thought it such an odd choice for an upscale wedding reception.

    2. I also liked Kathy Ireland’s eyes on the cover for the 25th anniversary swimsuit issue in 1989. I’m in an ad for SI branded sportswear in that issue.

    3. A woman writing about her interviews a couple decades ago with over 100 women and their experiences being unfaithful and filing for divorce (women file the vast majority of divorce cases) said that men need to understand that women in America are incredibly angry with men, and they want REVENGE.

  36. One can always fight back against too much political correctness in our social scene. I hadn’t been to the rifle and pistol range in a couple years, so I did that a few days ago.

    Youtube is still a rich source of relatively wild content.

    Warning: This swimsuit runway show should probably carry an R rating.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZS6KP48kQc

    There’s a couple of plus sized ladies in there, which is just good business sense IMO. A couple of ladies with implants probably. Also, a little amusing is the exaggerated gait (as always) and a couple of near stumbles with those extreme shoes.

  37. Martha said in one interview that she prefers “younger men.” Besides the money and publicity, this photo shoot was all about her picking up younger men in the Hamptons this summer for a one-night stand.

    If I run into her in the Hamptons, I’m volunteering.

  39. Martha Stewart so well illustrates the sound advice an uncle gave me as young man re choosing a wife:

    “Looks fade. Passion cools. Cooking lasts!”

  40. “…this photo shoot was all about her picking up younger men in the Hamptons this summer for a one-night stand…”

    So then degenerate trash.

  41. There’s a couple of plus sized ladies in there, which is just good business sense IMO. A couple of ladies with implants probably.

    I used to teach physical diagnosis to medical students. USC pioneered the practice of using actors and actresses to teach medical students back when I was in medical school. One reason was the surfeit of actors and actresses in LA. They act out little scenarios to teach history taking and act as subjects for anatomy and physical exams. One serious problem I encountered was trying to find a female model without breast implants. They are rare in LA.

    Maybe it would worthwhile to teach breast exams on both with and without implants.

  42. I’m surprised you didn’t invent and then patent something like “Removable Implants”.
    Pop ’em out. Pop ’em back in.
    You know—for educational purposes.
    (Seems to have been a demand for it…)
    – – – – – – – – – –
    By the way, isn’t the larger question here—and I suppose we should thank M.S. for suggesting it, if only implicitly—something along the lines of, “Whatever happened to ‘inner beauty’ “?

  43. This article is one of the many reasons I so love Ms. Neo’s blog. I think that we must be pretty close to the same age as we share some of the same delicate sensibilities.

    Regarding the Martha Stewart SI gig- I totally agree with Neo that the boobs could have used some more help in the volume and uplift departments.
    As long as Martha was going for the artificial glam shot- why not go all the way?

    Whoever the artist was that photoshopped and/or did the hair and makeup, they did a fantastic job. If I had the money for really good plastic surgery I would do it in a heartbeat.

    Getting old is such a drag for women especially.

  45. Anheuser-Busch and especially their Bud Light brand are paying a heavy price for going woke and pandering to the LGBTQ++ crowd, and likely joining them soon are going to be Miller light, and Adidas. *

    It also appears that Target is next in line to invite boycotts. **

    Did it ever occur to these companies that pandering to a tiny, but very vocal minority by abandoning and insulting their far more numerous existing customer base is not a sound business decision?

    Or has leftist fanaticism just blinded them to the likely outcome of their actions?

    Or,perhaps those making these suicidal business decisions just don’t care if they get exposure for their idealogy?

    * See https://humanevents.com/2023/05/17/adidas-infuriatingly-uses-biological-male-models-to-advertise-womens-swimsuits-bras

    **See https://www.theblaze.com/news/target-boycott-satanism-transgender-violence-abprallen-lgbtq?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=twitter

  46. To judge from what I see on YouTube, a whole host of wits with a talent for mockery are just piling on Bud Light, to such an extent that it might just turn out that Bud Light—become the subject of such a volume of constant and withering mockery—will no longer be a viable brand.

  47. She looks like Glynda the good witch from the Wizard of Oz, just needs a magic wand

  48. A great line from the article Jim in Alaska linked:

    “It appears that men are more likely than women to defend femininity because they admire it so much.”

  49. OBH at 4:15am: when our 14 year old daughter completed her orthodonture treatment, (unknownst to me) she was given an appointment for a glamour photo shot as part of the final processing. The end result was an attractive 14 year old transformed into a gorgeous 22 year old. Spooky.

    Art Deco at 9:09am: reference cosmetic surgery – surely you would make an exception for most of our Leftist political class to have the pimple at the top of their necks removed?

    Old Texan at 11:21am: “I am not sure if being an excon would keep her from doing that.” But she was only indicted and convicted, not impeached and convicted. And the SCOTUS has already propounded that the states cannot specify any more restrictions than are in the Constitution.

    TommyJay at 12:37 pm: ref swimsuit runway – in 2002 a male coworker returned from a trip to the beach with his family, and mention was made of the preponderance of “dental floss” on display.

  50. I haven’t looked at the pix of Martha and am not planning to, they sound a bit off-putting.

    I recall reading that there was a commie plot to uglify public spaces like library grounds with hideous corroding metallic “sculptures.”

    Haven’t see this yet, but is it coming — a pot-bellied middle-aged male model in a wife-beater undershirt?

  51. The way things are going, we may soon witness a decision by SI to put Hunter Biden on the cover of its next swimsuit issue.
    (If it DOES ever happen, he’ll most likely be modeling a full-length, see-through spandex wet-suit…with reduced reproductions of some of his better-known paintings covering sensitive areas; though if that proves a bridge too far then there’s always the prison-stripe design….)
    “Hunter Biden Faces Call For Key Business Associates In The Arkansas Proceedings”—
    https://www.zerohedge.com/political/hunter-biden-faces-call-key-business-associates-arkansas-proceedings

  53. In the New Age of “Woke,” the proper refutation is the classic Peanuts cartoon of the obsessive pianist Schroeder.

    Beethoven was his hero. His bust on a shirt, with text saying “Beethoven. Suck it, Wokies.”

    I’ve long had on my list to view the British made for TV movie “Eroica” The Movie (some places) from 2003, twenty years ago. So, it’s 200th anniversary. (You should be able to stream it free on Youtube; there seems to be more than one post up of it.)

    It is June, 1803 — 220 years ago.

    It synthesizes an epochal moment in history where EVERYTHING changes.It has the finest casting, first rate scripting, and excellent production that surpasses the genre.

    The conceit of the film has the greatest symphonist, the father if the musical form Hayden, sitting in for the final movement. The revered man becomes an oracle, defining the turn in time, away from classicism, into ego centered artistry in place of pure craftsmanship.

    Leonard Bernstein judged the first two movements of Beethoven’s Third Symphony as the most revolutionary works in the entire symphonic musical literature.

    Controversial in that time and place, as we get to see at this private premiere, it took three years to be accepted as a masterpiece.

  54. Art Deco:

    Lovely lady (Diana Muldaur), thank you for the link. Beautiful too, just as God made her.

  55. Thanks much Windbag, but, um, I don’t believe I’ll open that one…
    Nothing personal…it’s just that I’m not a huge fan of mankini-kind (my misanthropic streak, no doubt); nor do I sufficiently appreciate the towering talent of the versatile SBC…(just not my type, I guess).
    As they say, “Life is too short”….
    (But I AM looking forward to that SI issue….)

  57. Martha Stewart made an appearance on Gordon Ramsay’s “Masterchef” television series in a recent season. I think at the time they filmed the show, she was 78 or 79 – not young – but I was surprised at how frail she seemed, and I was surprised that the producers had let that show through the filming and editing process.
    Speaking of people who are starting to show their age, Gordon Ramsay looks every bit his 56 years on recent shows…

  58. I looked her up and found they are related. Sort of.

    She spent her childhood in Martha’s Island, Massachusetts, and was brought up alongside her younger brother, Geoff Muldaur, who is the ex-husband of the musician Maria Muldaur.

  59. Jordan Rivers said, “Haven’t see this yet, but is it coming — a pot-bellied middle-aged male model in a wife-beater undershirt?”

    Well, Senator Fetterman will have to do in the meantime. He fancies wearing gym shorts and a hoodie around the Senate, even when he’s being photographed with four other senators: “Fetterman even kept his hoodie on for a news conference on the debt ceiling last week, with four Democratic colleagues clad in suits standing alongside him.” I first saw the photo over at Instapundit with the caption, “When you think it’s casual Friday but it’s only Thursday.” Anyway, you can see Fetterman’s casual gear (including a shot of his lower legs) at the link:

    https://nypost.com/2023/05/22/john-fetterman-ripped-over-unprofessional-senate-sweats/

    Maybe someone should give him a Roman senator’s toga, and show him how to wear it. He’s tall enough to carry one off.

  60. Back in college, there was occasional discussion about whether anybody in your high school graduating class would have qualified for Playboy. Usually, somebody would say yes. We weren’t as aware of the effects of makeup through lighting, and the idea of a hundred shots to get the good one hadn’t occurred to us.
    But, still, likely candidate.
    Might have been wishful thinking.

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