Snakes and snails
You may have noticed I haven’t written a post about Biden’s foot that supposedly was broken while he was playing with his dog. That’s because the subject barely interests me, and that includes whether he actually injured it while playing with a dog or in some other more embarrassing way.
I don’t need Biden’s broken foot to tell me that Biden is frail and old and subject to breakdown. I can see that with my own eyes. Plus, since I’m close to “a certain age” myself, as are many of my friends and relatives, I know about – and have some natural sympathy with – some of the vagaries of getting older.
I think that Biden is way too frail in mind and body to be president, but if that was my only or even my major objection to a Biden presidency, I’d consider us to be fortunate. His (or his handlers’) plans for the country are my real worry.
That said, this is the story Biden tells about his foot:
“What happened was I got out of the shower. I got a dog and anybody who’s been around my house knows — dropped, little pup dropped a ball in front of me. And for me to grab the ball,” Biden told CNN journalist Jake Tapper in his first post-election joint interview with Vice President-elect Kamala Harris.
“And I’m walking through this little alleyway to get to the bedroom. And I grabbed the ball like this and he ran. And I’m joking, running after him and grab his tail. And what happened was that he slid on a throw rug. And I tripped on the rug he slid on. That’s what happened. Oh man, not a very exciting story.”
On the contrary, it sounds if not exciting than at least rather interesting in the visual and conceptual sense. Was Biden dressed, for example? Did he actually grab the dog’s tail, something that’s a no-no? Why does he have hazardous throw rugs in the house that don’t have non-slip backs? I almost wrote “in the hallway” rather than “in the house,” but Biden described what I can only assume is his hallway as a “little alleyway,” which is a very odd phrase to use.
But the reason I’m writing about this – the only reason – is that for me his statement conjured up something I hadn’t thought about in – well, in a dog’s age, actually in several dogs’ ages – and that’s a pair of nursery rhymes from my youth.
The first one goes like this:
What are little boys made of?
What are little boys made of?
Snakes and snails
And puppy-dogs’ tails
That’s what little boys are made of.
Apparently there are variations of the rhyme in which instead of “snakes” we have “snips” or “slugs” or a few other rather icky creatures, but “snakes” is the version I learned. Can you imagine teaching a child that today? You’d be hauled off for child abuse.
I recalled that there was also a girls’ version but couldn’t remember it till I looked it up, and then it came back to me:
What are little girls made of?
What are little girls made of?
Sugar and spice
And everything nice
That’s what little girls are made of.
I have a vague recollection of my mother reciting that one to me rather hopefully, and my thinking it wasn’t something I was going to be able to live up to. It’s not that I was mean; I just wasn’t sugar and spice and everything nice and I knew that it would be too much of a stretch to try to get there.
OMG! What he says sounds so specific with the details that I believe it is a lie!
“I’ll develop some disease and say I have to resign” is perhaps the most bizarre statement yet made by the senile and corrupt buffoon who may (alas!) be sworn in as president next month. This was perhaps intended as a joke, yet so obvious are his cognitive decline and the ruthless ambition of the Lady Macbeth of color, who is clearly avid for power, that, should he be deemed through the 25th amendment (to which Pelosi alluded two months ago) incapable of serving in office, it will seem in retrospect to have been a prescient acknowledgement of his own impotence.
I love dogs. Who grabs their dogs by the tail? Sounds weird, like everything else Biden.
Apparently there are variations of the rhyme in which instead of “snakes” we have “snips” or “slugs” or a few other rather icky creatures, but “snakes” is the version I learned. Can you imagine teaching a child that today? You’d be hauled off for child abuse.
neo: Isn’t that what they are teaching today, albeit dressed-up in the fancy language of “toxic masculinity”?
‘I’ll develop some disease and say I have to resign’ ranks right up there with his ‘we have the most diverse voter fraud system’ statement as the most truthful statement this guy has ever said.
OMG! What he says sounds so specific with the details that I believe it is a lie!
charles Yeah, that’s the ticket!
–Jon Lovitz, “Saturday Night Live”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=su9ExdWyT-w
Oversharing is a Biden hallmark and also typical of liars. The overshares often include details we’d rather not know about, like the nudity (a continuing theme).
His broken foot details are like the guy getting asked about an alibi by the police and pulling out a bunch of time stamped receipts for purchases of gum, French fries and bottled water. It is so detailed it makes you believe it less.
And anybody that would pull his dogs tail like that is an idiot.
I assume that Biden is lying, because that is the default position. Never mind that the story is too bizarre for words. Start with the idea that he was “running” after the dog. As for Neo’s speculation about his state of dress, I readily believe that he routinely runs around the house unclothed, since there are apparently true stories of him swimming nude in front of female Secret Service Agents. I wonder if females will be exempt from his detail?
As for his comment about resigning; I have remarked before that I consider it entirely possible that he was offered the services of the hidden hands with the understanding that he would step aside at some point. For this narcissistic individual, going down in history as an elected President without having to actually do the job may well be sufficient; although I would expect him to hang around long enough to attach his name to some initiative. Maybe start a war.
Addendum. I suspect that the very ambitious Kamala was selected/imposed because she has proven to malleable. Ask Willy Brown.
huxley:
Good point.
As to the resigning thing. Harris will ideally want him to stay for 2 years so she could then run for two terms after that. If he resigns in the next 2 years she can only run for one term.
Foot bone fractures. Could happen in a fall. Could happen if he dropped something heavy on his foot. Could happen if someone stepped on his foot. Could happen exactly as he said. Who cares? He’s of an age when strange little maladies start to happen. Expect more of these things. Unfortunately, he could be injured or ill and out of commission for some time. Guess who will be in charge then? Did any of the voters who voted for him even ask themselves that question? One more reason why they kept him in his basement for the duration of the campaign.
Prediction: His health is going to be ta major news topic going forward.
Good one on puppy dog tails Neo, and an apt response from Huxley.
Little boys always were subject to slings and arrows, sometimes in jest, and sometimes not. Paddling wielding teachers were not particularly funny (I never saw a girl paddled BTW.) Back in the day, we were taught to suck it up, Masculinity had its role in the scheme of things That part of the equation is changing; and it is not an improvement in my largely irrelevant opinion.
OldFlyer:
“Masculine republics give way to feminine democracies, and feminine democracies give way to tyranny.” Aristotle
I hadn’t read his story for the fracture yet. I am struck by how positive it makes him appear. He is so playful and active.
Chris:
Yeah, like a 5-year-old.
I thought you were all sugar and spice, neo. Then you used “effing” in a headline.
Illusions shattered. Oh well.
Being injured after trying to pull his dog’s tail is not a good start for the alleged next leader of the “free world”.
Nude codger pulls Fido’s tail, slips on rug, breaks foot already ensconced in his mouth.
He’ll resign from office if he isn’t able to live up to Giggles’ high moral standards.
Sounds like if Biden makes it to the White House, the Secret Service may have issues with the pooches.
Who remembers this Jim Stafford gem from 1974? Back when pop was fun.
Clueless boy meets naughty girl.
________________________________________________
I remember when Mary Lou said
‘You want to walk me home from school’
And I said, ‘Yes, I do’
She said, ‘I don’t have to go right home
And I’m the kind that likes to be alone
As long as you would’
I said, ‘Me, too’
And so we took a stroll
Wound up down by the swimmin’ hole
And she said, ‘Do what you want to do’
I got silly and I found a frog
In the water by a hollow log
And I shook it at her
And I said ‘This frog’s for you’
She said
‘I don’t like spiders and snakes
And that ain’t what it takes to love me
You fool, you fool
I don’t like spiders and snakes
And that ain’t what it takes to love me
Like I want to be loved by you’
–Jim Stafford, “Spiders & Snakes”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TR0A7IWWr0
huxley,
I remember it, think I still have the cassette.
Also remember the “shocking” follow-up, “My Girl Bill”.
Given our president-select’s penchant for appropriating the words of others, as he looks forward to beginning his reign, I suggest that he adopt a well-known Latin phrase as his personal motto. “Mens Sana in Corpore Sano” is obvious, but a tad too ironic, even for him. I think the simpler, more direct “Cave Canem” is perfect. Over and above the timely nature of the admonition to him, everyone would be free to determine who the dog is and why one should beware of him.
The nursery rhymes about little boys and little girls reminded me of a poster that my mother had on the wall of our house when I was growing up in the 1950s. It was “What is a boy?” Here is a photo:
https://bremlang.blogspot.com/2009/07/what-is-boy.html
The text is hard to read in that photo. Here is the text:
https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/manvotional-what-is-a-boy/
The photo says: “From an advertisement in The Saturday Evening Post. © The New England Mutual Life Insurance Company.”
My mother grew up with only sisters. Her first child was a girl. When her next three children were all boys, she discovered that boys were DIFFERENT. I think she put this poster on the wall to help her keep her sanity.
Aesopspouse conjectures that he truly was running after the dog
… and tried to kick him.