Sarah Jessica Parker’s shoes: the sequel
The Manolo, he has spoken.
And he has a lot more to say on the subject than I did:
The second, and more perplexing matter, is the Charlotte Olypmia platform pumps, of which the Manolo’s friends have inquired “How? Why?”
The problem is that unless you are the Japanese Lolita Princess Fairy, you cannot credibly mix these outrageous shoes with anything that is itself outrageous. If these shoes are to be worn you must first be absolutely certain you can walk in them (which if anyone can walk in these it is the Sarah Jessica Parker) and secondly, they can only be paired with something that allows them to be the focus of the total outfit.
The Manolo would have advised the SJP against the dress, as lovely as it is. However, if she were intent on wearing the dress, the Manolo would have softened the makeup, put the hair down, removed the belt, ditched the necklace, and changed the shoes for something elegant and minimalistic, something that would be the next thing to barefeetedness, for this dress is adornment enough.
Of the course, the problem is that we are no longer in the era of elegant and minimalistic shoes. In the stead, now we are in the era of fantastical and expressive shoes-as-art-and-armor, heavy shoes with greaves and metal plates. While this is perhaps somewhat satisfying for the Manolo, such shoes preclude certain ornate dresses from being worn in seriousness.
More simply put, you cannot mix statement shoes with statement dresses.
I may have taken some wrong turnings in my life, but I am proud and relieved to say that I have never committed the faux pas of mixing statement shoes with statement dresses. In fact, I’ve probably never even worn either, although I’m not completely clear on the parameters of the genres.
OUCH!!
Translation:
when one wants to go out and make a good impression one does not decorate the way bus drivers from certain countries reinvent ostentatious tassels and dingle balls.
My most recent statement shoes were $5/pair leather loafers from Salvation Army.
Finally! The Manolo! He of the superfantasticness of the mens and the womens and the SJPs, all at the oneness.
I heart the Manolo.
I may have taken some wrong turnings in my life, but I am proud and relieved to say that I have never committed the faux pas of mixing statement shoes with statement dresses.
If it weren’t already obvious you’re an aristocrat, that sentence alone would give it away.
Of the course, you and the Manolo – you are in cahoots!
Besides, he got it all wrong: the era, it is of austerity and restraint, true – but only for us proles. Our Betters live in a different time: Michelle Obama exceeded all previous First Ladies with her staff of 27-28 with $1.75mln budget. Private hi-end residences took a sharp upturn in renovations and redecorations (see this job ad, for example, and note the words ” budgets are limitless”) – and have you seen Town and Country magazine lately and notice the jewelery they peddling?
Seems to be the trend among the redistributionist class. Ms Putin and her husband seem to like Breguet though i do hear also that he like Patek as well.
I looked at Breguet catalog last year, quite nice.
A friend once said he was going to get a Rolex, I wanted a Breguet, he looked at me like i was nuts.
I have a make up bag in the drawer. When I asked sis if she wanted a lamberston truex make up bag, she said, who? I said never mind.
i dont have nor have i ever had money for a Breguet, an ex girlfriend who was a social reg debutant showed me that side of things.
I know L&T and their boutique from my photography work.
🙂
Neo, I just want to know whether, back when you first began to contemplate setting up a blog to explore the ramifications of your political change, you ever imagined that you might some day title a blog post “Sarah Jessica Parker’s Shoes: The Sequel” and collaborate for insights with no less than The Manolo! Don’t get me wrong, I’m oh so glad you did — the Necco Wafers and the ballet and the shoes are the spoonfuls of sugar that help the politics go down — but I’ll bet you didn’t expect it!
“Of the course, you and the Manolo – you are in cahoots!”
No, no, no…
Say rather: Of the course, the you and the Manolo – in the cahoots you are!
vanderleun: I have a Russian accent, not Manolian!
I could care less about Sarah Jessica Parker’s shoes or dress, but this:
…actually makes sense to me.
Does that mean I’m turning metrosexual?
rickl, Not only that you are turning, but that you have turned–into the turningness of the metrosexualness of the womens. The Manolo has spoken, and it shall be so.
I don’t think I’ve seen a more ridiculous pair of shoes in my life.
She looks like one of those jingle trucks we always encountered in Afghanistan. Think she might be deep cover Taliban?
I may have taken some wrong turnings in my life, but I am proud and relieved to say that I have never committed the faux pas of mixing statement shoes with statement dresses.
Ah, yeah; in the Age of Twitter, one does not speak in paragraphs.
…and the straight male says,
“Huh? What shoes.”
The Daniel, he is right…
As a happily-married straight man with five kids, I’ll confess to being a little fuzzy on the subject of ‘statement shoes’ or ‘statement dresses’ (or using the word ‘statement’ as an adjective in the first place, I might add). Is this supposed to be analogous to Patrick Swayze’s “say something hat“?
respectfully,
Daniel in Brookline
Women thing men and women are the same, but in truth, men dont have transformational relationships with their underwear or clothing in general. 🙂