I mostly agree with you.

That sitting on the rug comment got my attention, too.

I am planning another post on this.

Is there a difference between pleasing yourself by going unshod (and that includes mocs and house shoes) in the quotidian privacy of your domicile on the one hand, and on the other, expecting people to do the same when you are proffering what is supposedly classifiable as “hospitality?

Do people who insist on everyone else going unshod when invited into the host’s house, recognize any difference between a strictly private portion of the dwelling and a more public space?

It seems only some do.

Let’s look at a couple of the assumptions of one of the latest commenters; as it illustrates this divide pretty well.

Tim Turner on July 15, 2019 at 3:58 am said in part:

“Interesting the range (and passion) of the comments.

I’ve never had a guest problem because I rarely have guests, and those I do also are generally from no-shoe houses or just used to it. “

Well, right there then we see a fundamental difference that spans several domains. 1st, the commenter is not really offering other people his hospitality or entertaining on any substantial basis. He states himself that he offers comparatively little of it, and when he does choose to allow someone in, the population of guests are pretty much restricted to those who feel just as he does.

Now earlier I was referring to what was regular and habitual entertaining of extended family and also friends at Christmas and other holidays. It certainly does not seem that this person, does anything like that or would have any interest in doing anything like that.

My guess and it is just a surmise, is that he does not sit around a large dining table on the major American holidays for a dinner with family and friends.

It is probably just not part of what he finds important or rewarding.

2nd, he makes an interesting assumption on how that entertaining he is likely to do, would be carried out; and, what sense of responsibility, attitude and even gratitude he anticipates his selected “guests” would likely feel in return for his hospitality if they did wear shoes.

And the answer is apparently: he does not anticipate they would feel much gratitude or care on their own, at all.

If so, and since he seems like a nice guy, I think he deserves a better class of friends

Once you start thinking about it, it does become rather gross to sit on a pro-shoe carpet. Someone literally may have walked in dog urine, or bubble gum residue, or some homeless guy’s whatever not 5 minutes ago, and now you’re sitting in it, getting all that sticky goodness onto your hands.

1. Sitting on the floor. I did that as a teen and in my 20’s when stoned with friends. But now? Not so much. I have a couch that I actually sit on rather than just using for a backrest. LOL

2. Apart from heedless children, I’ve never encountered a guest, relative or otherwise, who was so indifferent to the host’s house and property that they would not take care on entering to be sure that their shoes were clean and suitable – for the more public spaces of the house at least.

One poster above commented on how terrible it is to have someone waving their socked feet a few feet from your dinner plate… much worse to have dog-poop shoes in the same position. Would you rather stand on X with smelly sweaty socks, or poop shoes?

When I was a boy I had a dog. And when you stepped in dog shit you knew it. And even cleaned up, those shoes were the shoes that remained outside; so yeah … a little common sense, of course. And any normal man with a normal olfactory sense knows within moments of entering an enclosed space, say a tiled entryway, if he has somehow gotten dog shit on his shoe. Like I said … How about a little common sense here?

For those who are offended when asked to remove your shoes, please reconsider. It may be offensive when someone asks you to remove your shoes. Would you be equally offended if someone came to visit you in your home and absolutely refused to remove their dripping mud-caked boots after tromping through the cow pasture because it was your responsibility to host them in comfort?

I happen to have a vacation farm. No livestock, but it does get messy. Boots are cleaned on two different mats outside, and then left on a mat inside.

That’s where mocs and “boat shoes” come in. And if someone wants to walk around in stocking feet there, then fine.

Problem solved, with a little common sense, as I said.

I was first introduced to the concept when my mother replaced her living room carpet… with white carpet. The idea was to reduce the stains, not germs. And it was something pristine and beautiful to behold, until a wine glass or dinner plate or two went over the wrong way. I think the next carpet’s scheduled to be dull brown.

I’ve always followed the no-shoe model in my own house. I’m comfortable in stocking feet, and it’s a nice transition ritual to come home and remove one’s shoes. It does track less dirt, mud, and dog poop into the house.

I would say the spread on the west coast is less a purification thing than just due to having closer ties to Asia than most of the US has. More business contacts, more vacations, more immigrants. Also, among Millennials, things like Japanese videogames and anime have a higher influence than previous generations. There’s a lot more cultural pollination.

I’ve never had a guest problem because I rarely have guests, and those I do also are generally from no-shoe houses or just used to it.

Once you start thinking about it, it does become rather gross to sit on a pro-shoe carpet. Someone literally may have walked in dog urine, or bubble gum residue, or some homeless guy’s whatever not 5 minutes ago, and now you’re sitting in it, getting all that sticky goodness onto your hands. I think about it every time I walk into a restroom and here that tac-tac-tac as my shoes stick to the floor. One poster above commented on how terrible it is to have someone waving their socked feet a few feet from your dinner plate… much worse to have dog-poop shoes in the same position. Would you rather stand on X with smelly sweaty socks, or poop shoes?

As far as germs go, I’d say in general that if your environment is less contaminated by germ-bearing substances (dirt, mud, etc) then it has fewer germs. Without taking swabs and cultures on A and B versions of my whole house in multiple weather and temperature conditions (I was once a lab tech) that’s the answer I’d go by. I’m not particularly afraid of germs, but I’m not really interested in cuddling up to them like teddy bears. I mean, you do wash your hands after using the restroom, right? Or do you always go by the “the body can take it” approach to cleanliness? Sure, no-shoe rules may be a stricter interpretation of cleanliness, but it’s still in the ballbark of common sanitary practices.

It also means less time spent cleaning, so it’s a household time saver.

For those who are offended when asked to remove your shoes, please reconsider. It may be offensive when someone asks you to remove your shoes. Would you be equally offended if someone came to visit you in your home and absolutely refused to remove their dripping mud-caked boots after tromping through the cow pasture because it was your responsibility to host them in comfort?

If you aren’t comfortable in someone else’s home, then cut your visit short and find some mutually comfortable location for your next visit. Don’t expect them to re-write house rules for you, especially if those rules relate to the preservation or cleanliness of the household (as shoe rules do).

The comment above about Randall and Carson and smoking as a guest illustrates the house-hold rule point (in the negative). Smoking leaves a lingering odor. If Randall lets Carson smoke in his home as a guest, then Randall will have to put up with the smell (and smoke stains, and cigarette burns) even after Carson leaves. If Randall visits Carson’s house and expects that Carson will refrain from smoking, he is in for a surprise when we walks in the door and smells the ash lingering in the air – even when Carson isn’t smoking. The age-old advice “When in Rome, do as the Romans” still rings true. And if you don’t like Rome, then don’t plan your vacation there.

I’ve been in several homes where I was uncomfortable for various reasons, and I either put up with it for business or I left (sometimes sooner rather than later).

Sorry about your foot issues Neo. If no-shoe homes are a common problem for you, I’d recommend carrying some shoe covers or special indoor-only shoes in your trunk. That’s probably not convenient for you, and I’m sorry.

When I lived in Minnesota, I generally removed my shoes upon entering a home (especially mine) when the ground was snowy (Winter) or muddy (Spring & Summer, most of Fall) but during a dry October I would remain shod with abandon.

First, I wouldn’t dream of telling someone to take their shoes off in my house. Its rude. Beyond the pale rude. You don’t treat guests that way. Its. Just. not. Done.

Second, any home I have ever gone to where someone commands that I remove my shoes before stepping into the home has never been as clean as they would like to believe it is. Additionally, of all those I have known who expected the shoes to come off (with one exception) they tend to be boorish in other areas as well. The type of people who also mistreat servers at restaurants and cashiers at the grocery store. It all seems related to me.

Malignant narcissism. It all about them and their floors. FFS.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka9mfZbTFbk

You are fortunate, then. I’ve certainly seen it. It’s particularly common among young adults. Very very common. And more common on the west coast than the east, although I’ve seen it quite a few times where I live, and some of the practitioners are my age.

It’s definitely a thing, as you will see if you read this new post of mine.