Comments on: When do you know you’re old enough to die?

By: Julia

Julia — Wed, 11 Apr 2018 14:50:52 +0000

I’m 51, and had bone cancer at the age of 15. I wanted to live, and here I am. After 25 years of atheism, I became a devout Catholic.

In the years immediately following my cancer treatment, I decided I wouldn’t go through it again. I also knew at that time that time softens all bad memories. So at this point I would go through it again.

In terms of death overall, from a secular perspective my main goal in exercising and eating right is compressed morbidity. From a religious perspective, death is merely a change, and I’ll be going home. I’m a pilgrim here – this isn’t my home.

By: Lorenz Gude

Lorenz Gude — Wed, 11 Apr 2018 04:08:32 +0000

I’m 75 and found the comments here very helpful. A good group of people Neo has gathered! I have a somewhat different perspective I think is worth mentioning because I struggled well below my potential up until about 10 years ago when I had a transformative spiritual experience. I had worked hard for it but recognised it as pure grace when it occurred. Since then I have lived my life in a far more productive and satisfying way, and, naturally enough, with a sense of making up for lost time. Unlike those of you who faced up to death in connection with military service I knew I was not so prepared when faced with the Vietnam War. I did nothing to avoid the draft – I was just a bit too old – but I knew I was not morally prepared to deal with accepting my possible death in military service. So for me there has been a counterintuitive lessing of the fear of death as I come closer to it. I find myself in agreement with those who say the veil gets thinner as we age. I do not have the ‘old enough to die’ mentality because I am getting too much done that needs doing. In conventional Christian terms I would say that the inner spiritual work has its own dynamic and is not not finished until it is finished – death notwithstanding. What is left undone must be completed in Purgatory. I saw a quite good movie about the inner work of transformation yesterday called The Endless. It explores the myriad ways we stay stuck in Hell – The Endless – and clearly suggests it is possible to transform Hell into Purgatory. Good news indeed. 😉

By: n.n

n.n — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 23:39:51 +0000

When I have cracked my last nut. Then, and only then, will my life be roasted and toasted.

By: neo-neocon

neo-neocon — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 17:48:11 +0000

Phil Underwood:

I am very sorry to hear about your wife.

By: neo-neocon

neo-neocon — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 17:45:06 +0000

Frog:

I imagine oncology to be both very difficult/challenging (losing a lot of patients) and very very rewarding (saving a lot of patients) at the same time.

By: Yancey Ward

Yancey Ward — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 17:35:58 +0000

If I make it to 65 (I am 51), I don’t think I would bother treating any life-threatening condition like cancer if it involved a major surgery. I would probably not bother to treat any quality of life procedure that didn’t promise a significant increase in that quality- in other words, I might do a knee or hip replacement, but it would have to be close to immobile before I would consider it.

I am getting an up front view of such a situation with my father who will soon be 73. He is suffering from serious dementia. I am fairly sure that were he of a well mind, he would forgo all interventions given his quality of life, but he is incapable of making such decisions now- I don’t think he is even aware of his circumstances in more than a cursory way- he is quite convinced he is well and it is my mother and myself who are demented.

By: Frog

Frog — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 17:05:08 +0000

I abandoned the practice of internal medicine in the 1970s because I was sick of seeing the “Worried well.”
I went into radiation oncology, where EVERY new patient needed my help, the best help that I could possibly provide. Took an additional three years of residency training, but a true blessing. Now I was offered the opportunity to cure cancers! Wow!

By: Surellin

Surellin — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 16:51:22 +0000

“Vegetarians don’t live forever – it just seems like it”. Carpe diem.

By: Ymar Sakar

Ymar Sakar — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 15:13:13 +0000

When a livestock needs to be harvested, then it is old enough to die.

By: Phil Underwood

Phil Underwood — Tue, 10 Apr 2018 15:11:20 +0000

I’m 82 and, except for cardiac arrhythmia which is controlled by medication, I’m quite healthy.

Over the past few months I’ve had to live through experiencing my wife sink deeper into dementia, become a wanderer or escape risk, and finally having to place her in a secure nursing facility. The hardest part for me was watching her go through it coupled with the strain, pain, and depression on my part. I’ll probably never completely recover from it.

As for end of life decisions, we don’t always have much of a choice in how it happens or doesn’t happen.